Walk to Emmaus part 1

I’m currently enjoying my time Walking to Emmaus, so I will make this short.

God has spoke to me about some pretty important things this weekend.

Wednesday night I was absolutely crushed because it hit me that my oldest daughters and my parents do not want me in their lives, or to be in my life. I take responsibility that I have made mistakes, I have not been perfect. I also place blame on my ex husband, Tim Latier, for provoking, defaming, and encouraging hatred toward me because of mistakes I am taking blame for (mind you he is not taking any responsibility for any of the things he has done to irreparably damage me).

I came here Thursday afternoon burdened with a broken heart.

  • Since that time, God has spoke to me. I haven’t done everything He has spoken, but it has given me direction.
  • I’m 33 weeks pregnant and in a quite a bit of discomfort.

  • Stop complaining. There are women that pray to get an opportunity to carry a baby, despite the pain it causes. I am completely blessed with a very healthy and active baby that God is forming in my body. Stop complaining.
  • My older daughters don’t want me in their lives.

  • Perhaps someday they will, there is nothing I can do to change their interest in having the mother that was devoted to them for most of their lives, in their life. Appreciate the daughter I have the ability to raise and have an AMAZING relationship with. I enjoy every moment with her, like it’s a gift from God. Oh wait… IT IS!
  • Most of my family, including my parents, want nothing to do with me because of the custody drama and defamation with and from my ex-husband.

  • While Walking to Emmaus, I have embraced and learned how many people God has brought into my life. Stacy and Mike have showed Alyssa and I love that I have NEVER felt from a majority of my family.
  • Patti has become such a positive role model and friend.
  • Mikey, Mariah, Jessica, Stephanie, Bethany, the list goes on. I have SO MANY PEOPLE that love me, I’m beyond blessed. I would rather have a handful of people that love my heart and soul, than I would a dozen-or-so blood relatives that are nice to me on holidays. This evening, I was surprised by hundreds of people that were praying for the group I was with, and 4 specific people from the church i am a member of/friends that were praying for me, individually. Brought tears to my eyes.
  • God also told me to forgive Tim. I will work on it. After I prayed and asked God to remove the hatred I had for him, I returned to my seat and talked with the woman beside me, stating I felt calloused- like it really didn’t impact my emotion to know I was burdened by such a severe hatred of that guy, and right then, the band started playing one of my baby girl’s FAVORITE songs, Name. I burst into tears. That little girl is my heart and soul, she ministers to me in everything she says and does. Back to that lesson from God, CHERISH HER instead of missing my older daughters.

    Thank you, God, for speaking to me.

    Thanks for stopping by! More later… stay tuned for part 2 🙂