The subject of post-partum depression come up this past week, and it came up again yesterday. It got me thinking, the worst times of my life have been mixed with the best times of my life.
When I became pregnant with all 3 of my daughters, I became my own worst enemy and I tore-down my self image.
How I handled my self-image caused a lot of damage with quite a few people. I have not had an opportunity to repair (or attempt reparation) with quite a few of those situations.
Before and after my daughters were born, I accept responsibility that I didn’t handle some things well, and it’s lining up with ante/postpartum depression.
Depression during pregnancy is called antepartum or prenatal depression, and depression after pregnancy is called postpartum depression.
I’m gathering the effects of such caused me to be undesirable to the men I was with, and I certainly felt undesirable. I didn’t seek the help that I should have during all 3 of my pregnancies, and I the fact that i hadn’t participated in therapy long-enough to understand how to process events with my youngest, caused quite a bit of problems.
I didn’t take it well when I found out about infidelity after my older 2 daughters births.
With all 3 of my daughters, the impulse actions seemed to be out of my control.
If you have the slightest concern you may have antepartum or postpartum depression, please talk to your doctor, or a therapist.
I would love to sit down and rationally discuss a positive plan with people in my daughters lives, but circumstances are preventing me from suggesting that. If the circumstances were to dissipate, I would love to discuss the future in a peaceful, rational way.