Post-partum Depression

The subject of post-partum depression come up this past week, and it came up again yesterday. It got me thinking, the worst times of my life have been mixed with the best times of my life.

When I became pregnant with all 3 of my daughters, I became my own worst enemy and I tore-down my self image.

How I handled my self-image caused a lot of damage with quite a few people. I have not had an opportunity to repair (or attempt reparation) with quite a few of those situations.

Before and after my daughters were born, I accept responsibility that I didn’t handle some things well, and it’s lining up with ante/postpartum depression.

Depression during pregnancy is called antepartum or prenatal depression, and depression after pregnancy is called postpartum depression.

I’m gathering the effects of such caused me to be undesirable to the men I was with, and I certainly felt undesirable. I didn’t seek the help that I should have during all 3 of my pregnancies, and I the fact that i hadn’t participated in therapy long-enough to understand how to process events with my youngest, caused quite a bit of problems.

I didn’t take it well when I found out about infidelity after my older 2 daughters births.

With all 3 of my daughters, the impulse actions seemed to be out of my control.

If you have the slightest concern you may have antepartum or postpartum depression, please talk to your doctor, or a therapist.

I would love to sit down and rationally discuss a positive plan with people in my daughters lives, but circumstances are preventing me from suggesting that. If the circumstances were to dissipate, I would love to discuss the future in a peaceful, rational way.

Here is some information on Antepartum Depressionand Postpartum depression.

2 thoughts on “Post-partum Depression

  1. Thank you so much for posting this. While I have heard of, and even read a little of, post-partum depression, like many other things it’s a difference when confronted with it, for lack of better terminology. When it comes to issues such as depression, I find it a subject that is very difficult for anyone to truly understand without having experienced it in some form or fashion of one kind or another.
    For those that have traveled down this difficult path, it does also mean a lot to, having been there and done that, to them reach out and be able to touch someone else by sharing your story and experience. I know that difficult as this journey can seem at times, at the same time it is still manageable and possible to get through it all because of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. There is no greater fear I think than to feel that one has lost control.

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    1. I’m happy that it shed some light on the subject. It’s a very serious subject, and it effects women very differently, some more intense than others. I beat myself up SO MUCH while I was pregnant and after child birth that I didn’t enjoy life. The problem was, especially with my youngest, I was triggered. I didn’t know how to cope with being triggered and the time to myself recently has shown me those difficulties. The bottom line is, I just want to be a mom and have quality time with my babies. I’m accepting responsibility that I haven’t always handled myself well, and intend on moving forward. If you, or someone you love, are dealing with ante or postpartum depression, proceed with caution and know that it’s ok to stop and “process” a situation, as I say.

      EVERYTHING WILL BE OK. Breathe in, breathe out… 💜


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